Have you ever wondered what it would be like to attend a weekend long swinger event?
After attending a few lifestyle Party events here locally in SoCal, my wife and I were frustrated with the current venue options for attending a swinger event. We went with no expectations to play or experiment with our current boundaries but to simply observe, be a voyeur and see how things worked within the lifestyle here locally for us. But when nobody is playing at all, it made us feel like we connected with the wrong “party people.” There simply was no party play going on. We stumbled on to SDC.com and joined up and set up our Couples’ profile in hopes of having better connections with others and maybe attending a party or two that was more eventful than our previous experience in October. NLW known as the National Lifestyle Weekend was being heavily advertised on SDC.com as the Super Bowl of swinger events over a 3-day weekend. Filled with fun, sun, like-minded adults and debauchery with limited tickets available at $650 per couple. It seemed a bit expensive to us being “newbies” in the lifestyle. NLW was advertising 3 pool parties at 3 different locations (2 locations being hotel takeovers) to choose from and 3 evening themed parties to attend for full ticket price. There were lesser rates per ticket but offered less parties to attend.
“If you have attended any lifestyle parties or events that are quality, you’re going to spend $80 to $100 minimum“
per person to get in the door as a couple, so when you do the price breakdown per party it was within reason for what they were expecting. After mulling it over with the wife, we booked the hotel and arranged for vacation time off from work. We were excited and horny thinking about what could be a great party weekend for us filled with fun, voyeurism and maybe some fantasy fulfillment we really wanted to experience as a couple away from home. The online shopping started immediately for themed event clothing to attend all the parties that were advertised. According to the schedule first night was business casual, 2nd night was Steam Punk, 3rd night was Glow Party and the final night was Black Tie Fashionista. Some shopping locations that helped bring our themed party outfits together were Amazon, Shien, and Temu, etc. We booked our room at the Sahara as the best central location for the planned events and the fact the main NLW pool party would be held there daily. Other NLW pool parties were also held at the Lexi and the English Hotels respectively. The NLW team offered weekly zoom meetings on Sunday mornings from 12 noon to 1pm with other NLW event attendees that had questions, concerns regarding the event, logistics, rules and realistic expectations, as well as an opportunity to get to know others attending the weekend. The Zoom meetings were led by Peter the event coordinator along with other promoters talking about their “after party” events etc. One Sunday was enough to get your questions answered but as usual we forgot to ask everything in the first zoom meeting, so we came back on for further clarification. Peter, the NLW promoter, was very professional in all aspects and takes a lot of pride in attempting to coordinate this large-scale party atmosphere over 3 days and 3 evenings. We spent hundreds of dollars on outfits to fit in with the designated theme nights. Not dressing up for a theme night is not an option for us. It’s a lot of fun and gets spendy quick, so watch your wallet.
On the first night upon our arrival, Wednesday night was dress up in business attire to business casual for a meet and greet at the Casbar lounge inside the Sahara hotel, we checked into the Sahara with friendly staff and unloaded our suitcases. After trekking through the desert for 5 hours, we were hungry. We headed to the Restaurant area downstairs of the Sahara and tried the Balla Italian Soul restaurant. Which was amazing. The wife wore a sexy black jumper pant suit with platform heels and looked delicious as always. I wore an indigo blue 3-piece suit with a pink shirt and no tie. Felt appropriate and matched the vibe of some other men who cared to arrive in style that evening. Others wore shorts and a golf shirt, but it’s night 1 and people are just arriving. Most women dressed for the event, but really, what is business casual for a Lifestyle party?
We spent the better portion of 2 hours mingling with other couples and making nice introductions and friendly pleasantries with people. One couple that we met and had a few drinks with (the husband) offered to cut out from the meet and greet and head right to their room for some playtime. He didn’t want to waste any time and just said it like he felt. Don’t blame him for trying, both wives looked amazing, but my wife wasn’t having it and the husband making the advances was “too Handsy” in her opinion for the start of the event. Attention husbands and single males, if you want to get in with a couple weather married or not, do yourself a favor and befriend the husband throughout the occasion and be respectful to his wife by giving a compliment and moving on and not lingering or becoming overwhelming to a couple. Husbands allow the women/wives to become friendly with each other and arrange further activity if the wives or female partners are interested at all. If the women are not comfortable with each other, I don’t care how great you think you are, it’s never gonna happen. Slow your roll and allow the evening to be non-rushed and watch the heat unfold. Nothing puts out a fire quicker than an eager male ready to get going asap! Keep your hands to yourself until it’s invited or allowed.
There was a strict rule within the casino lounge and public areas of no adult shenanigans, you had to keep things “family friendly” while in casino areas otherwise they would be in jeopardy of losing their gambling licenses. So, security was on the lookout.
Thursday Day 1: The first official pool party was spent at the private rooftop pool at the Sahara Hotel. You had to show your VIP all access pass to get in. It “was first come first serve” for the beach lounges. Fortunately, we reserved a poolside cabana for the day (10 days prior to the event to share with a group of couples we were introduced to on Kasidie.com.) The cabana was expensive, but the shared expense helped, and the Cabana turned out to be a sanctuary from the desert sun and extreme heat. Outside temperatures were exceeding 117 degrees on Friday. The rented Cabana came with food and drinks for the price of the cabana rental with a cap limit of $500.00, anything more would be added to an extended tab. The cabana turned out to be a great investment in networking and meeting new people in the shade and comfy couches. The pool party at the Sahara on Thursday was filled with beautiful lifestylers of all ages and body types. Oldest couple there was in their late 70’s and youngest was in their mid 20’s. The music was bumping with new and old music loud enough to enjoy and still have a conversation with someone. It was very liberating and refreshing with the chilled pool temperatures. For some bathing suit tops came off with pasties covering nipples, so as to keep things legal for the Sahara security team. Women were flirty and friendly having fun in the pool either with their husbands or solo. Not slutty just fun and free. Alcohol was flowing with mixed slushy drinks, appetizers and fruit flavored Trulys and White Claws by the case or bucket full were being consumed like hydration packs on a deserted island. The pool party on Thursday was a success and a great way to get the weekend going. We spent the day in our cabana with a great couple and bunch of other great people willing to share in the expense of the cabana and share some flirty smiles. Dipping in the chilled pool water to frolic with some beautiful women on each side of me while my wife watched from the cabana and smiled with satisfaction and said, “you’re such a whore, …. I love it”. As my wife leaned into her female cabana visitor “why do I love seeing my husband with other women so much?”
The pool party was wrapped up with them closing the area and advised us all to be ready by 8 pm for the Steam Punk themed night being held there in the Sahara Hotel. We gathered our pool side gear and closed out our Cabana tab and headed to our room where we took a nap. We aren’t that old, but taking a nap before the all-night events is a plus. Before heading to the evening festivities, we decided to grab a bite at the Asian “Noodle Den” inside the Sahara. The Food was really good, we highly recommend it. It took us some time after dinner to get our costumes on for the Steam Punk party. My wife looked incredible with a patchwork lavender corset, black skirt, fishnet nylons and black boots. I wore a purple paisley vest with a lavender shirt to try and match the wife’s corset, grey pants, boots with a leather hat. Also incorporated a black tool belt with mini vibrators and vials/cartridges of alcohol as shots to serve to thirsty party goers. In our opinion we fit the theme of the Steam Punk night, at least in our head we did. Have fun with the planning, and your costumes. It’s part of what creates excitement.
90% of the guests were dressed for the event with some wearing more clothing than others, while some didn’t even bother to read the memo. We found ourselves gravitating to a quieter crowd and getting to know each other. People traveled from all over the world to attend. Some of the ladies got a bit flirty and were enjoying each other. While others appreciated watching. There were outside events happening at other venues that we could have booked to attend, but having spent $650, we didn’t think that spending an additional $100 per couple was necessary. In hindsight, maybe we should have. After what we would consider to be a quiet evening, we headed to our room to get ready for the next day.
Friday Day 2: After popping out of bed hungry Friday morning, we decided to head over to one of the takeover hotels to see the happenings. We went to The English Hotel for breakfast. It was 5-stars amazing, just wait, foodie blogs might make their way to this sight at some point. From where we were sitting, we could tell that the pool party was kinda low key. So, staying was not our plan. After breakfast, we stopped over at the Lexi Hotel (Takeover hotel #2). As we walked through the lobby, we got to check out some of the vendor booths attending the event. It was fun to see all the costume ideas and sex toys for sale. The Glow Party was scheduled for this evening and happening at The Lexi. The pool looked delicious with the half-naked crowd. Many of the ladies found themselves comfortable enough to go topless, as did my wife. We had some fun chatter and drinks with others in the pool and then had to get ready for the evening’s events. Coming back to The Lexi Hotel was fun, seeing how they transformed the bar and lobby into a Glow fun extravaganza. Everybody had their own idea of what glow meant and it did not disappoint. Again, it was a fun Meet & Greet, there was a vendor doing 360-degree videos of couples for $35, which we got to keep. People were pretty reserved.
“Not our cup of tea, but might be somebody’s else’s martini.”
After a couple of hours, we headed over to The Green Door to see what it was like. We had never been and had been curious. It happened to be one of the late evening events scheduled with the NLW. Those paying in advance through the NLW ticketing was only charged $80 for Entry. Now, being that the event was using this as a venue, our feeling was it should have been closed to outsiders. The owner of The Green Door allowed non-lifestylers, into the club which was a bit upsetting to my wife and I. Unfortunately, it was the establishment owners call to allow entry of single men, which is why we left shortly after walking in. The club looked like it hadn’t seen a remodel since its opening in 1998. While many may find it appealing, it’s not quite the environment we were into. We headed back to the Sarah to end our night on our own. Strike out day 2.
Saturday Day 3: Saturday offered us one last opportunity to get some action in. Alas, Sahara Hotel Pool party here we come. We were down at the pool by 11am ready to have some fun. The day was enjoyable with people so much more relaxed with each other. By midafternoon the sun was baking, and my wife’s bathing suit top came off after 3 Trulys and her alter ego finally showed up to the pool party where I watched her kiss 3 or 4 women and one hungry husband who wanted to see what his wife was raving about. It was hot to witness my wife relaxing and letting go. Things at the pool party were getting worked up, it was very intoxicating being around that energy for the first time in my life at a pool party. Couples and groups of people were coming and going to their hotel rooms upstairs for more non-public playtime. The Pool party ended around 5 pm and we got ready for the last party of the weekend, the Black Tie Fashionista at the Circa Hotel in the Legacy Club. We arrived with some new friends and found that the reserved area for our party had been moved to mix in with the vanilla crowd yet again. By this time, we were getting tired of trying to decipher between swingers vs vanilla people. I thought the whole idea was to take the guess work out of it so we could relax & enjoy with “Like-Minded” people. What we got was unapproving eyes from those that didn’t understand our flirty behavior not realizing that we were mixed in with others and woman being thrown out of the party for kissing a man in public because they were keeping a watchful eye on the crowd that was paying to be there. We had a few laughs and that was about it. We didn’t feel comfortable to be ourselves. Again, we headed back to our hotel at the end of the evening. We found that it really didn’t make for a flirty atmosphere to be concerned for watchful eyes. Strike out Day 3.
“Never have I ever thought we’d have a problem getting laid at a lifestyle event!“
Our Opinion: Now, you could say that we should have just made the best out of it all, which we did. In hindsight, we should have done a lot of things differently. However, the event was sold as a “National Lifestyle Weekend” with all the parties included in the fare. In realization, the NLW is a huge “Meet & Greet” event that will get you in the door to much racier events, as NLW guests, provided you book & pay the extra for them in advance (That’s where all the play fun happens.) As a side note, we later found through the people we met, that the event coordinator gave out the VIP All Access Passes to those who purchased the $250 entry tickets, so as to pad the events. Was that really fair to those of us that went all in at $650 a couple for entry? He never reached out nor did he offer anything in compromise. To add salt to the wound, as we were leaving, we received a text message offering us a $150 promotional entry into the 2026 NLW event as an early bird purchase.
The NLW itself IS NOT A PLAY EVENT. If you are ok with spending a lot of money to meet people, then this is the event for you. We did have fun and met some great people. But found the events a little bloated with niceties and expectations rather than memories of naughty happenings. We likely will not be attending again.
